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Best Practices In Negotiation Speaker Says It Can Hurt To Ask!

Following a sports blog I noticed an exchange that caught my eye as a negotiation speaker.

A writer said a sports team located in a nice city tries to steal its ballplayers by offering lower salaries, sort of a "playing in paradise" premium.

The next comment replied: "It doesn't hurt to ask!"

I wonder.

One of the biggest imponderables in negotiation is emotionality.

For instance, in my "Best Practices in Negotiation" class at UC Berkeley Extension the other day, a few participants grew heated during a simulation. The "boss" more or less said, "You're fired!" and the employee replied, "I'm not fired; I quit!"

I was pleased to see this solar flare, because way too often we pretend that negotiations, especially in large corporations, will be civil and completely rational. They aren't.

And one thing that happens with frequency is what I call an aversion reaction to certain ploys. In everyday terms, people get mad and storm off.

For instance, a well known negotiation guru likes to tell the story about the gent who goes to buy a suit at a small retail store. He tries it on, the pants and sleeves are chalked and pinned, and he casually asks the clerk, "Which shirt and tie would you recommend?"

Dutifully, the helper selects a nice match and shows them to the customer, who then says, "If I buy the suit, you'll throw in the shirt and tie, free with my purchase, right?"

This is called a "nibble" in negotiations, asking for something minor, perhaps sweetening the deal by 5% as communications conclude. Because a sale is so imminent, many clerks and business owners will cut commissions and margins without hesitation, to seal the deal.

But not all!

Some sellers will stiffen and say no, they can't do that, and if the gent wants the suit and other items, he'll need to pay full price for everything.

A very few will be offended and have an aversion reaction to this style of haggling.

"We're not that kind of store. Please remove the suit and shop elsewhere. Thank you. Good-bye!"

For this select group of negotiators, what they consider to be politeness comes before profits. Implicitly, they are saying, "We choose our clients as much as they choose us, and we can un-choose them, at will."

So, "It doesn't hurt to ask!" has exceptions.

Or, to mix a metaphor: Nibbles in negotiations don't suit everyone!

About the Author

Dr. Gary S. Goodman is a top-ranked negotiation speaker, telemarketing speaker, and customer service speaker at Google, and a distinguished, sought-after sales speaker, motivational speaker, and attorney. President of Customersatisfaction.com, he is a frequent TV and radio commentator and the best-selling author of 12 books and more than 1,700 articles that appear in 25,000 publications. President of Customersatisfaction.com, Gary conducts seminars and speaks at convention programs around the world. His new audio program is Nightingale-Conant's "Crystal Clear Communication: How to Explain Anything Clearly in Speech & Writing." His web site is:http://www.customersatisfaction.com, and professional speaking, seminar, and consulting invitations can be addressed to:gary@customersatisfaction.com.

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